October 14, 2007

Yo Mama’s So Fat …

Filed under: Randomness — La Bestia @ 7:56 pm
Tags: , , , , , ,
Yo mama's so big, it takes her 2 hours just to haul ass.

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Yo mama’s so big her belly button’s got an echo.
Yo mama’s so big she cant wear an X jacket cause choppers keep landing on her back
Yo mama’s so big she uses I-95 for a Slip ‘n Slide
Yo mama’s so big that they had to change “One size fit’s all” to “One size fits most”
Yo mama’s so big when she goes to the movie theatre she sits next to everybody.
Yo mama’s so big when she went to the airport and said she wanted to fly they stamped Goodyear on her and sent her out to the runway
Yo mama’s so big, it takes her 2 hours just to haul ass.
Yo mama’s so fat a picture of her would fall off the wall!
Yo mama’s so fat and old that when God said “Let there be Light”, he told her to move her fat butt out of the way.
Yo mama’s so fat at the zoo, the elephants started throwing her peanuts.
Yo mama’s so fat every time she wears high heels, she strikes oil.
Yo mama’s so fat her blood type is ragu
Yo mama’s so fat her college graduation picture was an airial.
Yo mama’s so fat her yearbook picture is an arial
Yo mama’s so fat if she got her shoes shined, she’d have to take his word for it!
Yo mama’s so fat if she wears fishnet stockings, they’d better be 50 pound test!
Yo mama’s so fat if she weighed five more pounds, she could get group insurance!
Yo mama’s so fat n black she jumped in the ocean and they thought she was an oil spill
Yo mama’s so fat she broke her leg and gravy dripped out
Yo mama’s so fat she bungee jumped and went straight to hell
Yo mama’s so fat she can’t even tie her own shoes.
Yo mama’s so fat she can’t reach her back pocket.
Yo mama’s so fat she can’t wear Dazzey Dukes. She has to wear Boss Hoggs
Yo mama’s so fat she dries her pants in the driveway
Yo mama’s so fat she eats biscuits like tic tacs
Yo mama’s so fat she eats wheat thicks.
Yo mama’s so fat she fell in love and broke it.
Yo mama’s so fat she gets clothes in three sizes: extra large, jumbo, and oh-my-god-it’s-coming-towards-us!
Yo mama’s so fat she got hit by a truck and asked “Who threw that rock?”
Yo mama’s so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway
Yo mama’s so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets
Yo mama’s so fat she has more nooks and crannies than Thomas’ English Muffin.
Yo mama’s so fat she has to buy two airline tickets.
Yo mama’s so fat she influences the tides.
Yo mama’s so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck.
Yo mama’s so fat she measures 36 24 36, and the other arm is just as big
Yo mama’s so fat she plays hopscotch like this: LA, Detroit, Chicago, NY ..
Yo mama’s so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller
Yo mama’s so fat she sat on a quarter and squished a booger out of George Washington’s nose
Yo mama’s so fat she sat on the corner and the police came & said “break it up!”
Yo mama’s so fat she shows up on radar.
Yo mama’s so fat she stood in front of the Hollywood sign and it just said H D
Yo mama’s so fat she tried to get an all-over tan, and the sun burned out
Yo mama’s so fat she uses a hula hoop to hold up her socks
Yo mama’s so fat she uses a mattress for a tampon.
Yo mama’s so fat she uses a pillow case as a sock.
Yo mama’s so fat she was baptized at Marine World.
Yo mama’s so fat she wears a VCR for a beeper.
Yo mama’s so fat she went to a Chinese Restaurant and ordered a 40oz. of gravy
Yo mama’s so fat she’s on both sides of the family
Yo mama’s so fat that she cant tie her own shoes.
Yo mama’s so fat that when I tried to drive around her, I ran out of gas.
Yo mama’s so fat the animals at the zoo feed her.
Yo mama’s so fat the highway patrol made her wear “Caution! Wide Turn”
Yo mama’s so fat they had to baptize her at Sea World
Yo mama’s so fat they use the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping
Yo mama’s so fat uses blanket as a washcloth
Yo mama’s so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up
Yo mama’s so fat when i took her to the beach, little keds surron “Free Willy, Free WIlly”
Yo mama’s so fat when she backs up she beeps
Yo mama’s so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too
Yo mama’s so fat when she dances at a concert the whole band skips.
Yo mama’s so fat when she fell over she rocked herself asleep trying to get up again.
Yo mama’s so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.
Yo mama’s so fat when she sits around the house she REALLY sits AROUND the house
Yo mama’s so fat when she sits on my face I can’t hear the stereo.
Yo mama’s so fat when she steps on a scale, it read “one at a time, please”
Yo mama’s so fat when she wears a red dress people yell “Hey Kool Aid ..”
Yo mama’s so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said “Taxi!”
Yo mama’s so fat when she went to the beach Greenpeace tried to drag her ass back in the water.
Yo mama’s so fat when the bitch goes to an all You can eat buffet, they have to install speed bumps.
Yo mama’s so fat when they used her underwear elastic for bungee jumping, they hit the ground.
Yo mama’s so fat you smell like bacon at 90 degrees
Yo mama’s so fat, when she travels, she’s gotta make two trips.
Yo mama was so fat that when she was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks.

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