Week 2 in the NFL and things are starting to take shape. Atlanta, Chicago, and Baltimore are good. Tampa, Oakland, and KC are not. So much for POS Sports Illustrated’s Super Bowl prediction of Carolina vs Miami. Reminds me of these two videos: Video 1 Video 2
Atlanta ran for over 300 yards against Tampa – who usually have their number. But Chris Simms is proving to be as useless in the pros as he was in college. And Michael Vick is on fire. We’ll know after week 5 (when teams have enough film to study and design defenses to stop whatever it is new that Atlanta is doing). Meanwhile – Tampa need to get in line to draft Drew Tate of Chad Henne. Atlanta 2-0. Tampa 0-2.
Baltimore’s dominating defense is back, and Oakland is in a world of hurt. Al Davis must have soiled his track suit watching his team play (Commitment to Excrement). After this rematch of the 2000 AFC championship game, Ravens 2-0, Raiders 0-2.
Carolina had the game won, then they went and tried some stooooopid lateral on a punt. Fair catch the thing and run it into the pile and run out the clock. No – Minnesota comes down, send the game to OT, then wins it in OT. Carolina 0-2. Minny 2-0.
Detroit’s Roy Williams said they should have scored 40 last week (they lost 9-6) and guaranteed victory this week. Myopia reigns. Detroit lose 34-7. Again – Chicago 2-0. Detroit 0-2. Looks like the speculation about Rex Grossman being replaced by Brian Griese was a little premature.
Cincy was expected to be good – and they are. They rolled over Cleveland today – Chad Johnson caught a TD pass and did the chicken dance in the endzone. Cleveland is coming along – but not just yet. Cincy 2-0. Cleveland 0-2.
Denver didn’t look good at all – this week or last week. No Mistake Jake has been replaced by Jake The Fake. But Denver managed to eek out a 9-6 OT win. Why? Because Damon Huard was even worse. Denver 1-1, KC 0-2.
Indy and Houston continued their relative paths over the past 5 years. Indy won 43-24. Indy 2-0. Houston 0-2.
Buffalo’s defense is proving stout. They should have beaten the Pats last week and they managed to harass Daunte Culpepper into turnover after turnover after turnover. JP Losman has turned into no mistake J, passing for less than 100 yards, but doing what it takes to win – namely not turning the ball over. Buffalo 1-1, Miami 0-2. Miami has never finished above .500 when starting a season 0-2 – which they’ve only done twice in 37 seasons. *sniff*
The Pats had a 24-0 lead – then the Jets started coming back. Long TD to Cotchery. Great catch and run by Coles. And they block a NE field goal with a minute left. So what do they do? Rely on Chad Pennington’s noodle arm to take them down the field. It was so bad – Teddy Bruschi intercepted the hail mary pass. Pats 2-0, Jets 1-1.
The Saints arte back! Two road wins before unveiling the new and improved Superdome next monday night. Green Bay was ahead in this one and New Orleans came roaring back. Reggie Bush was a non-factor, but the Deuce was loose for 2 TDs. Bret Favre played better, but still not enough. Saints 2-0, Pakcers 0-2.
Perhaps the best game of the day was the NFC East battle between the Iggles and Los Gigantes. Philly went up 24-7, but the Giants picked (and lucked) their way back to tie at the end of regulation. Then Eli Manning threw up a prayer to Pexiglass who beat the corner in 1-on-1 coverage. Walk-off TD. Thanks for coming. Iggles 1-1, Gigantes 1-1. The Freak has a knee injury and is probably (my guess) done for the year.
San Diego opened up a can on Tennessee – another team with crappy QB play. 40-3. Vince Young came in and actually did better than Kerry Collins. I wonder who’s sister Billy Volek knocked up, because for him not to be starting, something bad musta happened. Phillip Rivers looked decent, but – look who he was playing. The Jets looked like champs against them last week. Chargers 2-0, Jets 1-1.
Seattle got back on track somewhat this week (my Survival pick) beating Arizona 24-10. Alexander finally got a TD and Darrell Jackson caught some passes. Imagine when Deion Branch gets on the field. Kurt Warner and the offense tried, but they’re still the same ol’ sorry ass Cards. Seattle 2-0, Arizona 0-2.
As I predicted, the 9ers are coming together behind second year QB Alex Smith, who is figuring things out now, hothead WR Antonio Bryant (ironically wearing #81), and the last great talent from The U – RB Frank Gore. They beat the former high flying Rams. 9ers 1-1, Lambs 1-1.
Dallas came back and Drew Bledsoe kept Tony Romo on the bench and the Dallas defense put the screws to Marc Brunnell. Dan Snyder is figuring out that money doesn’t buy wins. The sooner he learns not to chase high priced free agents, to build through the draft, and to let football people make football decisions the better the Skins will be. But for now – 27-10 means that Dallas is 1-1 and DC is 0-2. Oh yeah – TO broke a bone in his hand. Oooopsie.
College
Notre Dame fell to #12 after being ran’d over by Meeeechigan on Saturday. Auburn moves up to #2 after beating LSU, USC is #3 after beating Nebraska, West Virginia is #4, dismantling Maryland, and Florida is #5 after winning in Knoxville. Oregon was the beneficiary of some of the worse officiating since the 2003 Fiesta Bowl. Oklahoma was up by 2 scores when Oregon came back to win on some really questionable calls and replays. Pac 10 Refs for a home game? I thought the crew came with the visiting team or was from a neutral conference. Homers.
Louisville moves to #8 and Miami drops out of the polls for the first time since 1999, breaking their streak of 107 straight polls. The Grim Reaper was seen asking directions to the Coker’s office. Did you know there are 42 former Canes in the NFL? Most of them stars, most recruited by Butch Davis? The cupboard is bare.
And More
The Dodgers finally remembered they were the Dodgers and have mercifully ceeded the NL West to the Padres. Maybe keeping the names off the back is a good way to prevent the fans from booing you by name. Then again – who are we kidding. Dodger fans don’t care about anything else but leaving early. Ryan Howard is now 3 HRs away from the Babe, 4 from Maris, and 5 from becoming the MLB’s true home run champion (that’s if you’re like me and don’t wanna count the McGwire/Sosa/Bonds beef-roids era). Let’s go Phills!
Tony Stewart finished second in this weeks race. Too bad it was one race too late. He’s not in the chase, but Mark Martin is! 75 points behind in 6th place, baby. Hopefully Kevin Harvick slows down some so the Viagra car can do some donuts on the infield.
Can you name 5 current top-20 tennis players – men or women?
Anyone seen Toby Bailey?
Overseas in Soccer – Arsenal, without Thierry Henry and Robin Van Persie, beat Manchester United in Old Trafford for their first EPL win of the season after winning their first Champions League game midweek. Emmanuel Adebayor scored the only goal with 5 mins to spare. Right after that Huge win for Arsenal who vault to 10th spot.
Chelsea join Man U in second after beating Liverpool at The Bridge on an absolutely sick goal by Didier Drogba. But top spot belongs to Portsmouth with 13 points. David Beckham came off the bench to score a goal for Real Madrid, Samuel Eto’o and Ronaldinho scored for Barca, and Kaka scored for AC Milan – who, with 3 wins, are slowly climbing out of the hole as a punishment for match fixing. Can they make it all the way? They’re only 11 back! 
Finally, Miami FC lost 2-0 to the Vancouver White Caps in the USL soccer playoffs. So I leave you with this – the people on the beach are symbolic of Miami football when put to the test.
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WTF is wrong with Kyle Wright. He has to be the worst QB at Miami in years. Even Ryan Collins, Frank Costa, and Geoff Toretta (Gino’s brother) were better.
Is it true that misery loves company? You damn right it is!!
