July 15, 2008

ShaqFu-ton

Filed under: NBA, Shaq, Basketball — La Bestia @ 8:50 pm
Tags: , , , , , ,
Yo mama's so stupid she thought hamburger helper came with another person

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Shaq and Shaunie’s divorce might be on hold. They were spotted relaxing in the Cayman, possibly getting access to all the money she hid from him. Allegedly.

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July 14, 2008

The Roundup from 2008-07-14

Yo mama's so fat when she dances at a concert the whole band skips.

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  • Heard this on the radio in relation to the Lakers’ Lamar Odom: “No Scrotum Odom” #
  • BestBuy.com - Check Gift Card Balance http://tinyurl.com/63aekt WORST WEBSITE EVER. Best Buy Sucks. #

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May 21, 2008

Crazy Chuck

Yo mama's so fat she can't reach her back pocket.

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From TNT’s Inside The NBA. They were talking about the Lakers vs Spurs conference finals matchup Charles Barkley called this the best Laker team that Kobe’s been on - which led to much discussion and yelling including an incredulous Chris Webber.



Crazy Chuck

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March 16, 2008

Richard Pryor in the NBA?

Yo mama's so big when she went to the airport and said she wanted to fly they stamped Goodyear on her and sent her out to the runway

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Man, doesn’t Philadelphia 76ers’ point guard Andre Miller look (and sound) like comedian Richard Pryor?


Andre Miller or Richard Pryor

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March 10, 2008

It’s About Time

Yo mama's so stupid she thought she needed a token to get on soul train

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Heat Wade hurtDwayne Wade has been a shell of himself this season after the toll his knee and shoulder injuries from last season took on him. He looked like he tried to come back too quick, but this, along with Shaq’s 4-year itch and Riley’s roster failure combined to make the Heat the worst team in the league, a place they haven’t been since their expansion years. With Shaq gone and a playoff place requiring a miracle, you hoped that D Wade would just shut it down for this year. Well, it looks like it’s finally going to happen.

Heat coach Pat Riley announced Monday that Wade, the All-Star guard and 2006 NBA finals MVP who has battled left knee pain throughout the season, will not play in Miami’s final 21 games this year.

Coach Pat Riley told the Miami Herald that Wade will have a “stimulation treatment” on Tuesday.

“I think it’s time,” Riley told the paper. “We’ve been walking around on eggshells with this thing. This treatment will help him.”

The move was expected, although its timing — with so much of the season still to play — was mildly surprising. But Wade missed Miami’s game against the Golden State Warriors on Friday because of knee stiffness, telling Riley at the time that it pained him just to get out of bed.

Good - this season soooo needs a reboot. Who woulda thought this team would implode so quickly after winning the title 2 years ago. Pat Riley needs to hire a coach and concentrate on building the roster. And D Wade should think about skipping the Olympics too. Ask Yao Ming what year-round basketball does to your health.

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February 18, 2008

The Dunk That Changed Dunk

Yo mama's so old when Moses split the red sea, she was on the other side fishing

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D12 a.k.a. Superman at the Dunk Contest



YouTube - Dwight Howard Superman Dunk

Per Dr. Z:

back in 1968, bob beamon broke the work longjump record by almost two feet. defending gold medalist lynn davies said, “you have destroyed this event”. lynn davies was wrong. silver medalist klaus beer said, “the rest of us are children.” klaus beer was correct. once every generation of so, an athlete does something truly astounding. after watching dwight howard dunk on saturday night, we are all children, including the entirety of humanity.

so now it’s time for the youngster of america and the world to behold a new way of looking at dunking, and to model themselves to not only reach the unfathomable heights of dwight howard, but somehow, someday, to put together an even better set of four dunks. that’s right. dwight set the bar ridiculously high. and the goal is now to clear that bar, and to push even higher.

dunk was dead. dunk is back. long live dwight howard, the man who saved the dunk contest.

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December 20, 2007

Scattered Thoughts on 2007-12-20

Yo mama's so old when Moses split the red sea, she was on the other side fishing

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November 14, 2007

Mini Blog for 2007-11-14

Yo mama's so stupid, I taught her how to do the running man and I haven't seen her since.

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  • Love me some Raven Symone http://urltea.com/23cp Hated her on the Cosby Show and Mr Cooper, but I love That’s So Raven. Check out her site. #
  • Princess Melissa: Livers & Gizzards http://urltea.com/23d5 Real World New Orleans’ Melissa on South Carolina and 8 ft giraffes. She’s funny! #
  • Bora looks to boost Jamaica into Cup http://urltea.com/23dr Shortly after this article, Jamaica fired Bora Milutinovic. So much for legends. #
  • Officer ‘rues’ killing Lazio fan http://urltea.com/23e2 FFF guys say that Italian hooligans don’t even respect the police, esp. after this #
  • Unemployment rate in southern Italy is 30% amongst youths. Parallels to England in the 80’s with economic problems and regional strife. #
  • FUD in England over this Israel game. http://urltea.com/23ev “Abramovich Won’t Pay $205,000 Bonus to Russian Soccer Players” #
  • ESPN - Pacman intends to take plea deal, get probation - NFL http://urltea.com/23f5 I know everyone learns at a different pace, but man.. #
  • Pia Sundhage named U.S. coach http://urltea.com/23iq officially moving on from the Greg Ryan era. Hope Solo? get your gloves on! #
  • ESPN - Yankees pitch $45M, 3-year deal to closer Rivera http://urltea.com/23ir Yankees have gone from a talent factory to a glue factory. #
  • Cricinfo - MCC head of cricket John Stephenson and a new prototype pink ball http://urltea.com/23is Susan G Komen plays cricket? #
  • Kissing Suzy Kolber: EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY - Tom Brady Knee Bounty Increased To $60, Plus Free Goodie Bag! http://urltea.com/23k4 hahahah #
  • Unreal. A Fire Joe Gibbs Site http://urltea.com/23k9 If this Washington were Italy, the fire would be real fire! http://firejoegibbsnow.com/ #
  • Stephon Marbury: ‘I Got Permission to Leave’ - FanHouse - AOL Sports Blog http://urltea.com/23ka Starbury - what a giant waste of talent. #
  • Can We Stop Pretending Adam Vinatieri Is a Good Kicker? - FanHouse - AOL Sports Blog http://urltea.com/23kc Wow - interesting opinion. #
  • Souring on Lemon, will Cameron reach for Beck? — South Florida Sun-Sentinel.com http://urltea.com/23kg FINALLY!!! This is a no brainer! #
  • ESPN’s NASCAR Crowd Noise Not Normal - FanHouse - AOL Sports Blog http://urltea.com/23kh No wonder MLB took their playoff games to TNT. #
  • 100% Injury Rate: Old school athlete ads are horribly awesome http://urltea.com/23kv Niiice - especially the Roger Clemens Zest ad. #
  • 10 Apps Every New Mac User Should Download - PaulStamatiou.com http://urltea.com/23nm Flip4Mac replaces WMP9 and Stuffit is no longer needed #
  • Rescue group finds new home for Ellen’s dog http://urltea.com/23nw Just got wind of this. Amazing. The Dog Mafia in this country needs to go #
  • If there’s anyone to blame in this case blame Ellen. She broke the rules. Where is the accountability. If anyone is responsible it’s Ellen! #
  • Aim your death threats at her. #
  • Nation Of Islam Sportsblog: Game of the Week: Duke Vs. Notre Dame http://urltea.com/23kk “Who to root for? Do we favor Hitler or Stalin?” ha #
  • The NBA in China: Opening a Super Market - washingtonpost.com http://urltea.com/23oj Elvin Hayes and Dave Corzine don’t appreciate China #
  • Microblogging With urlTea - My Twitter Bookmarklet at myopiclunacy.com http://urltea.com/23oq No more JSON for me. I updated the tool. #
  • How to setup your Mac web development environment http://urltea.com/23p8 Or you could just use LAMP http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MAMP #
  • California Golden Bears: One Way To Get Tree-Sitters Down http://urltea.com/23pg this is priceless! #
  • Don’t Tell the Donor.org: Baby Jessica’s $1 million trust fund http://urltea.com/23pi Talk about foreshadowing of the future of TV news. #
  • http://tinyurl.com/22wedq iStalker on an iPhone #

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