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March 27, 2009

Twitter

Filed under: NBA, Obama, Politics, Shaq, Society, Twitter — Tags: , , , , , , , , , — webadmin @ 7:00 pm


 

I’ve already predicted the death-by-fad-killing of Twitter many places after Obama made it cool for the Hollywood elite and political lemmings to use. And, of course, athletes are now using it. Women soccer players from the new pro league that starts this weekend are going to be updating their twitter page before, during and after their games. Publicity stunt much?

Usually these things are either one way communication or someone is hired to do the tweeting which makes it as unique as a fan letter reply – or so I thought. Check out Shaq’s Twitter feed:

@PhoenixSunsGirl is now @DigitalRoyaltyabout 3 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@TallLadyTX wht part of texas u n I live in pearland and friscoabout 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@divasunny2u yea right u r gonna fall twiceabout 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@kirkfox na 2about 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@prasannathani thanks kevabout 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@WiseSupreme I neva hate bro love lebron dats my dude just a friendly challenge calm down o wise oneabout 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@deejayquest I’m pretty gOod daddy were u dj atabout 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@divasunny2u yea rightabout 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@Jenisizzle why thank uabout 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@KenPeters I do it bigabout 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@Jenisizzle loveabout 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@jonathanchard u groped meabout 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@pookiedmb dam whatabout 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@divasunny2uwhat up playaabout 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@firedancergirl kabout 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@Roy1524 I’m n utahabout 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@francescap thanksabout 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@timrosenblatt excuse me what’s recosabout 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@yoMICK try to babout 20 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@James2Stapleton nopeabout 20 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@bc142 lolabout 20 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@James2Stapleton yea man if he’s the future gotta lead him n da right direction he’s a good kidabout 20 hours ago from TwitterBerry
@MsSGlover naaaaa4:58 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry
@girl_alex thks4:57 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry
@johnmark88 wt up4:57 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry
@icanhazvajaja shhhhh4:57 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry
Just arrived at portland arena first person I c is my favorite reporter. Dam I love cheryl miller4:37 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry
Stay tuned-prepare for SHAQ to “enlyten” you!!!4:19 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry
100 people n the prtland area just came for tickets wow portland twitterers r niiiiiice3:53 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry
And the winner is @cbakes and @dondondon and @mmirkil3:29 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry
@studiophile1234 were r u3:28 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry
@ryanguard cali or fla3:27 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry
@djjuggy I love utah sorry about the jazz owner he was a great man3:27 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry
@mmirkil u better hurry3:26 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry
@MsRochelle_ u r to short I mite not c u3:25 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry
@joniquepryce I’m there alot3:25 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry
@HERBIECRICHLOW he was a nice guy he really was3:25 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry
@24kt_Mac_Daddy bring it were3:24 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry
@Sk8FashionRight probly wnt happen does he even start3:23 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry
Anybody in portland touches me rt now will get two tickets I’m at redstar cafe3:23 PM Mar 26th from TwitterBerry

Damn – when does he have time to play ball? No wonder the Suns are out of the playoffs this year.

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January 24, 2009

Ba-Rap Obama



 

PREZ ZINGS GOP FOE IN A $TIMULATING TALK – New York Post

WASHINGTON — President Obama warned Republicans on Capitol Hill today that they need to quit listening to radio king Rush Limbaugh if they want to get along with Democrats and the new administration.

“You can’t just listen to Rush Limbaugh and get things done,” he told top GOP leaders, whom he had invited to the White House to discuss his nearly $1 trillion stimulus package.

One White House official confirmed the comment but said he was simply trying to make a larger point about bipartisan efforts.

“There are big things that unify Republicans and Democrats,” the official said. “We shouldn’t let partisan politics derail what are very important things that need to get done.”

That wasn’t Obama’s only jab at Republicans today.

In an exchange with Rep. Eric Cantor (R-Va.) about the proposal, the president shot back: “I won,” according to aides briefed on the meeting.

“I will trump you on that.”

Not that Obama was gloating. He was just explaining that he aims to get his way on stimulus package and all other legislation, sources said, noting his unrivaled one-party control of both congressional chambers.

Ba-Rap Obama (with apologies to

Shaq O’Neal)

Obama Run DMCbr />Check it, You know how I be
Last week Rush couldn’t do without me
Ya know how I be
Last Week O’Reilly couldn’t do without me

For real dawg, now that’s the GOP
There ain’t nobody in the world do it smarter than me
That’s like Fox News trying to be harder than me
That’s like Republicans crap, a non-starter with me

That’s like John Boehner’s ass trying to barter with me
That’s like Limbaugh thinking that he’s smarter than me
That’s like a Gitmo no-torture charter with me
That’s like Bill Clinton and Jimmy Carter ‘fore me

That’s the difference between first and last place
Yo Fox News, Tell me how my ass tastes
Rush Limbaugh, Tell me how my ass tastes
Okay, Hannity, Tell me how my ass tastes

Yeah, Glenn Beck, you can’t do without me
GOP, You can’t do without me
Matt Drudge, You can’t do without me
Everybody, O’Reilly, Tell how my ass tastes

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July 15, 2008

ShaqFu-ton

Filed under: Basketball, NBA, Shaq — Tags: , , , , , , — webadmin @ 8:50 pm


 

Image and video hosting by TinyPic

Shaq and Shaunie’s divorce might be on hold. They were spotted relaxing in the Cayman, possibly getting access to all the money she hid from him. Allegedly.

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May 21, 2008

Crazy Chuck



 

From TNT’s Inside The NBA. They were talking about the Lakers vs Spurs conference finals matchup Charles Barkley called this the best Laker team that Kobe’s been on – which led to much discussion and yelling including an incredulous Chris Webber.



Crazy Chuck

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March 10, 2008

It’s About Time



 

Heat Wade hurtDwayne Wade has been a shell of himself this season after the toll his knee and shoulder injuries from last season took on him. He looked like he tried to come back too quick, but this, along with Shaq’s 4-year itch and Riley’s roster failure combined to make the Heat the worst team in the league, a place they haven’t been since their expansion years. With Shaq gone and a playoff place requiring a miracle, you hoped that D Wade would just shut it down for this year. Well, it looks like it’s finally going to happen.

Heat coach Pat Riley announced Monday that Wade, the All-Star guard and 2006 NBA finals MVP who has battled left knee pain throughout the season, will not play in Miami’s final 21 games this year.

Coach Pat Riley told the Miami Herald that Wade will have a “stimulation treatment” on Tuesday.

“I think it’s time,” Riley told the paper. “We’ve been walking around on eggshells with this thing. This treatment will help him.”

The move was expected, although its timing — with so much of the season still to play — was mildly surprising. But Wade missed Miami’s game against the Golden State Warriors on Friday because of knee stiffness, telling Riley at the time that it pained him just to get out of bed.

Good – this season soooo needs a reboot. Who woulda thought this team would implode so quickly after winning the title 2 years ago. Pat Riley needs to hire a coach and concentrate on building the roster. And D Wade should think about skipping the Olympics too. Ask Yao Ming what year-round basketball does to your health.

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November 20, 2007

Mini Blog for 2007-11-20

Filed under: Cricket, Humor, Mike Tyson, Mini Blog, Music, Parody, Shaq — Tags: , , , , , , , , , — webadmin @ 11:59 pm


 

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Fake Blogs Rawk!!!



 

I’ve found a goldmine of humor – and it’s called Fake Blogs – or more accurately NewsGroper. It’s Stephen Colbert meets DailyKos almost. I was reading The Miami Sports Blog and found out that Miami Heat center Shaq had a blog … well, a fake blog – where I uncovered this gem about his recent divorce:

Shaunie, I am sorry that this had to happen. But when a woman tries to keep secrets from Shaq, she must pay the consequences. When you were hiding that cash in the garbage pails behind the pool, I thought it was just part of our kinky Sopranos role-playing. But it turns out that you were really hiding cash from me, and now Shaq is broke.

It’s not all your fault, Shaunie. It doesn’t help that Shaq only allowed you to address him as “#32.” It was probably wrong of me to demand that you dress as a Nubian Queen to all of our dinner parties. What probably put you over the top was when Shaq made you repeat “The Royal Penis is clean, your Highness” after every time we made oral love.

Had me ROLLING. But they have tons of other fake blogs there too! People like Hillary Clinton and Rudy Giuliani, Britney Spears, Vladimir Putin, Ann Coulter and Donald Trump. In fact MSNBC got in trouble, apparently, for taking these blogs seriously!:

IN a story that MSNBC.com ran last Friday on how the legal troubles of disgraced NFL star Michael Vick are dividing African-Americans, Web site editors apparently fell hook, line and sinker for a parody Web site that made up a quote from the Rev. Al Sharpton.

In the first version of the story that appeared on MSNBC.com, Sharpton was quoted as having written on his personal blog, “If the police caught Brett Favre (a white quarterback for the Green Bay Packers) running a dolphin-fighting ring out of his pool, where dolphins with spears attached to their foreheads fought each other, would they bust him? Of course not. They would get his autograph, complimenting him on tightly spiraled passes, then bet on one of his dolphins.”

You have to read the story to understand just how shitty a job this MSNBC reporter did. I mean there was some pretty obvious hyperbole in there. How fucked up an opinion must you have of Sharpton that you’d accept this as truth? That you can’t distill nonsense from sense. That you don’t notice the names of the other fake bloggers on the site including Vladimir Fucking Putin!?! (that’s his real middle name) So what does MSNBC call it in their retraction? A hoax. Hah! – Fake Al Sharpton had a response locked and loaded:

I can assure you, I’m no hoax. When I said that Brett Favre was probably fighting dolphins against each other to the death with swords crudely attached by duct tape, it obviously wasn’t real; it was a METAPHOR. First of all, the adhesive in the tape wouldn’t hold up in salt water, and also, how many backyard saline pools have you ever swam in?

Fake Blogs RULE!

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November 7, 2007

Kobe? Look At What You Got Rid Of.

Filed under: Kobe, LA Lakers, NBA, Shaq — Tags: , , , — webadmin @ 9:24 am


 

Shaq – ever the clowner, ever the kid. Instant team chemistry. This vid is courtesy of MiamiSportsBlog.com

Shaq left LA where he helped the Lakers to the Finals 4 out of 5 years and collected 3 rings. Why? Because the owner of the Lakers is cheap and Kobe didn’t stand up to it. Fast forward 3 unproductive seasons later and now Kobe wants out. Chad Ford wrote an article about why other teams aren’t lining up for the Kobster.

I spoke to a number of NBA sources who have been engaged in or are familiar with the Bryant trade negotiations. Almost all evidence from these conversations points to this conclusion: Bryant’s trade value isn’t nearly as high as he or the Lakers would like to think…

1. Does Kobe have too much mileage?

Kobe is already 29 years old. When he turns 30 in August, he’ll reach an age at which many players decline… It’s not only the years that concern some teams, but also the minutes. Counting NBA regular-season and playoff games, Bryant has logged 33,576 minutes — 918 games of about 37 minutes each, in just 11-plus seasons. That’s more “mileage” on his legs than on the legs of Ray Allen (age 32) or Allen Iverson (32)… And about the same as Chris Webber (34). More than Alonzo Mourning (37). More than Sam Cassell (37). Further, Kobe has had knee problems the past few seasons, including arthroscopic knee surgery in 2004 and 2006…

2. Is Kobe really the best player in the NBA?

It’s often said, by players, journalists and fans alike, that Bryant is the best player in the league. Without a doubt, he’s one of the greatest offensive forces we’ve ever seen. Indeed, his skill level in all aspects of the game is probably the most advanced we’ve seen since Jordan. But not everyone thinks that makes him the best player in the game… Bryant has never led the league in John Hollinger’s PER (player efficiency rating), which combines a player’s stats and percentages into a single measure. Last season, Bryant was well behind Dirk Nowitzki and Dwyane Wade . To put his numbers into historical perspective, his career-high PER of 27.97 in 2005-06 ranks No. 42 all-time in the league. Several current players have posted a higher PER than Kobe did in his best season… A newer measure from 82games.com, adjusted plus/minus, “reflects the impact of each player on his team’s bottom line (scoring margin), after controlling statistically for the strength of every teammate and every opponent during each minute he’s on the court.” By this measure, Bryant ranked sixth in the NBA last season, behind players such as Jason Kidd and Gilbert Arenas. In one in-depth report, Bryant ranked 21st in the NBA in clutch performance…

3. Is Kobe a winner?

This question probably resonates the most in NBA front offices. Several GMs I’ve spoken with have questioned aloud whether Kobe is really a winner… On the surface, it appears that Kobe is a winner. But dig deeper and there are real questions…The more central questions, according to some observers in the NBA, revolve around Bryant’s approach to the game. His amazing determination, while certainly a key part of his success on the court, does not always translate into leadership or a winning attitude… Certainly Bryant wants to win. But he wants to win his way, according to many who have followed his career. And when you break it down, that translates to this attitude: I would rather lose my way than win your way…

4. Is Kobe worth it?

Those three issues lead up to the ultimate question: Given all the complex considerations, does it make sense to acquire Kobe? First of all, it’s just not that easy to make a deal, especially during the season, when the roster rules make it more difficult to trade many players for one. Second, Bryant makes a lot of money — $19.4 million this season… Third, such a trade would be a gamble, and NBA teams are generally risk-averse, as we saw at the last trade deadline…Fourth, there is the straightforward question of talent: As great as Bryant is, can he replace the talent a team would have to give up? And if a team gives up too much to acquire Kobe, that team would be no more equipped to compete for a championship than the Lakers are, which would potentially start the cycle all over again, with Bryant’s unhappiness dominating the team.

… But if the status quo holds, teams will have to look forward to the summer of 2009, when Bryant can opt out of his contract at the age of 31. By then our eyes and hearts will likely have caught up with what the numbers and logic are already telling us: Kobe Bryant is a great player, but in a team sport like basketball he lacks the ability, on his own, to deliver an NBA championship.

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October 19, 2005

Dr. Z on the NBA



 

doug christie is practicing for his new role in the drama crying while eating.

rodman got banned from the chatroom, so he ditched smegmonkey and now he’s posting as coughing anus. bannination is 3…2….1..

the world’s most popular last name is wang. the most popular first name in the world is mohammed. but there isn’t anyone named mohammed wang. go figure. the wangs are holding steady, but hell is reporting a recent up-tick in new membership named mohammed. overheard: satan is apparently half french. le bwahahaha. more recruits are coming soon: new blazers prefer new coke.

mel gibson confuses me. first he’s scottish patriot. then he’s an american patriot. then he’s on the wrong end of a railroad tie, trying to start-up an aramaic masochism cult. dude. pick a team.

robert parish named chairman of the joint chiefs.

coach nate is reluctant to follow the blazer tradition of using ouija board and blow-darts to choose starters.

predrag stojakovic and brad miller. peaches and gravy.

they say the only mammal that can’t jump is an elephant. they ain’t seen webber lately. they also say that reno is west, not east of los angeles, which completely evades the reality that reno is north of los angeles, not east nor west.

the league substance abuse policy doesn’t include viagra for coaches, so all the bladder/prostrate fellas can stay on the sidelines without retribution.

''
oliver miller strains stomach muscle, vitals critical, priest contacted.

like shaq said of the lakers back in 1998, “right now, the popcorn is still a little brown seed.” welcome to 2005-2006, where the brown seed looks pretty small again.

lakers will allow kwamme to sing the national anthem, just so he can have a highlight.

a decade ago, derrick coleman was asked why he declined an invitation to go hunting with teammate jayson williams: “i'm not going hunting with anyone who plays the same position as me.” … fast-forward to the present and a limo driver is dead from shotgun wounds and williams is in pound-my-anus prison for splattering dude’s guts. wow. the next time you see derrick coleman, ask him to pick lotto numbers for you. dude sees into the future.

solved!! karl malone owns-up that he was such a poor ft shooter as a rookie that he starting taking to the ball — to put some english on it.

celtics miss parquet dead spots, hire oliver miller to dent new floor.

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