November 5, 2008

Wasilla Hillbillies Steal Clothes, Clueless on NAFTA, Think Africa Is A Country

Yo mama's so ugly the doctor is still smacking her ass

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What a great article - found on Eddie’s page. There are lots of other interesting tidbits but the highlight is here:

Highlights: Newsweek’s Special Election Project | Newsweek Politics: Campaign 2008 | Newsweek.com

NEWSWEEK has also learned that Palin’s shopping spree at high-end department stores was more extensive than previously reported. While publicly supporting Palin, McCain’s top advisers privately fumed at what they regarded as her outrageous profligacy. One senior aide said that Nicolle Wallace had told Palin to buy three suits for the convention and hire a stylist. But instead, the vice presidential nominee began buying for herself and her family—clothes and accessories from top stores such as Saks Fifth Avenue and Neiman Marcus. According to two knowledgeable sources, a vast majority of the clothes were bought by a wealthy donor, who was shocked when he got the bill. Palin also used low-level staffers to buy some of the clothes on their credit cards. The McCain campaign found out last week when the aides sought reimbursement. One aide estimated that she spent “tens of thousands” more than the reported $150,000, and that $20,000 to $40,000 went to buy clothes for her husband. Some articles of clothing have apparently been lost. An angry aide characterized the shopping spree as “Wasilla hillbillies looting Neiman Marcus from coast to coast,” and said the truth will eventually come out when the Republican Party audits its books.

you have to take it with a grain of salt, surely, but it’s still fun. I love that some of the clothes were “lost” - yeah - cuz I’ve used that excuse too! hahah. Also fun is this FOX NEWS report about Palin not knowing that Africa was a continent. Are you kidding me? Sure explains the Couric interview … and how Alaskans re-elected Ted Stevens.

Other highlights: McCain aides wanted to tell McCain that it was over before the last debate. Pain ran with the Ayers attack before the campaign approved it. McCain’s campaign was planning but scrapped a soft-on-crime Willie Horton ad as well as a “dancing with a lesbo” ad with footage from Ellen. Obama had to be convinced not to consider Hillary for VP. Hillary was on better terms with McCain than with Obama. And my favorite:

At the GOP convention in St. Paul, Palin was completely unfazed by the boys’ club fraternity she had just joined. One night, Steve Schmidt and Mark Salter went to her hotel room to brief her. After a minute, Palin sailed into the room wearing nothing but a towel, with another on her wet hair. She told them to chat with her laconic husband, Todd. “I’ll be just a minute,” she said.

Oh yeah, daddy! That’s what I call a serious debriefing.

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October 31, 2008

It’s getting tighter and tighter!

Yo mama's so old she owes Moses a quarter.

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According to RCP Obama needs 32 electoral votes from the battleground states and McCain needs 143. Given the margin of errors in statistical samples, a lead of less than 5 is considered to be a toss up, and in reality, should probably be given to McCain. There’s also the Bradley effect and the young-voter-apathy effect.

Makes me think that Obama’s shot will be from winning some combination of Pennsylvania, Virginia, New Mexico, and Colorado for him to reach the 270. I don’t include Nevada because from what I’ve been hearing about polling there, it’s typically more favorable to Democrats than in reality. McCain needs almost all of the battleground states but if he takes all the toss ups and West Virginia, all he needs is Pennsylvania, Ohio and Nevada, or Ohio, Colorado and Virginia. Not impossible by any means.

State (electoral votes) lead
Florida (27) Obama +3.5
North Carolina (15) Obama +2.6
Missouri (11) McCain +0.4
Indiana (11) McCain +1.7
Georgia (15) McCain +4.0
Montana (3) McCain +3.8
Arizona (10) McCain +4.4
Ohio (20) Obama +5.8
Colorado (9) Obama +6.6
Nevada (5) Obama +7.0
Virginia (13) Obama +6.5
New Mexico (5) Obama +7.3
West Virginia (5) McCain +8.0
Pennsylvania (21) Obama +9.3

So here are some interesting clips from articles I’ve been reading.

On Spreading the wealth: That Wealth Spreader - TIME

We may disagree on how much to spread around and how to go about it. We all tend to think that it’s someone else’s wealth that needs to be spread around and that it ought to be spread in our direction. But the principle that the unequal distribution of wealth is a legitimate concern and government policies should mitigate it has been part of American democracy since at least the New Deal. In fact, it is a commonplace that the moderate wealth-spreading of the New Deal saved American democracy. Today collecting checks from people and issuing checks to other people–or the same people–is the government’s main domestic activity.

Although it was an off-the-cuff remark and one that Obama probably regrets, he actually put it well, avoiding the suggestion of envy or class war, which are the usual accusations about such talk. Spreading it around is “good for everybody,” he says. And who disagrees? Or would you like to live behind locked gates and hire guards to protect your family from kidnapping, as in places where they spread it around even less than here?

On the challenges for the next president: How They Would Lead — Printout — TIME

A sad fact of contemporary politics is that we’ve lost the ability to get through a campaign without transforming honorable alternatives into cartoons of good and evil. Disagreement is out; denunciation is in. The distinctive tune of our day is hysteria with a drumbeat of hyperbole, all set in the key of bad faith.

Underneath, however, Americans still long for the mystic chords of memory strummed by the better angels of our nature — a patriotic harmony that we like to think is the song of our nation at its best. This is why the two candidates who fared best in this election were the ones who spoke most convincingly about bringing us together. When the two are finally narrowed to one, his mandate will be change, his timetable short and his environment stormy with division. At a historic moment desperate for a successful President, everything will hinge on one man’s ability to navigate by the clouded star of common purpose.

On branding Rashid Khalidi a terrorist: The Anti-Semantic Joe Klein - Jeffrey Goldberg

he’s a fierce partisan of the Palestinian cause, of course, and in my conversations with him, and in his writing, I see that his sympathies frequently cause him to distort Middle East history. But an anti-Semite? I don’t think so. In fact, Rashid Khalidi is one of the rare Palestinian advocates who argues, as he has with me, that Arabs must study Jewish history, including and especially the history of Jew-hatred, in order to better understand Israel, and to reach a compromise with it.

On the trickle-down folly: RealClearPolitics - Articles - Referendum on Trickle-Down

McCain regularly charges that Obama wants to be the “redistributor in chief.” Speaking at the rally here at Shippensburg University, Palin was forced to say this about Obama’s support for a variety of tax credits aimed at helping the poor and middle class: “He says that he is for a tax credit, which is when government takes your money in order to give it away to someone else.”

That is, of course, a mighty peculiar definition of tax credits. It is also an odd argument from a ticket that itself is committed to a research-and-development tax credit for corporations.

It’s true that Obama favors “refundable” tax credits to help low-income workers, including some who may pay no income taxes but do pay many other taxes. McCain has argued that Obama’s refundable tax credits amount to “welfare.” That, too, is a strange claim, since McCain favors refundable credits as part of his health plan. But the whole idea is to persuade voters such as Emily Daywalt that Obama really is just out to help those “who don’t do anything.”

And that is why Obama’s 30-minute advertisement on Wednesday night was targeted directly to voters such as Daywalt, or at least to those like her who are still persuadable. It was Obama’s tribute to the country’s working people who seek nothing more than decent incomes, health care and a chance to see their children succeed. It was less a political ad than a documentary about the value of work and the responsibilities of family life.

For years, Republicans have argued that the way to help struggling working people is to give more money to the wealthy. Obama is saying that we should cut out the middleman and help working people directly. My hunch is that Obama’s argument will prevail, and that conservatives will then work overtime to try to deny the judgment the people have rendered.

On how McCain might win: Commentary » Blog Archive » 10 Reasons Why McCain Might Win

9) The fire lit under Obama’s young supporters in the winter was largely due to Iraq and his opposition to the war. The stunning decline in violence and the departure of Iraq from the front page has put out the fire, to the extent that, like the young woman who made a sexy video calling herself Obama Girl and then didn’t vote in the New York primary because she went to get a manicure, they might not want to stand on line on Tuesday.

and my favorite hypocrisy of the day: Washington Times - THOMAS: Obama’s smoking audio

Electing Barack Obama president of the United States would be a roll of loaded dice. We will live (and possibly die) to regret it. Republicans have made many mistakes and deserve the punishment they are now getting, but the one charge that cannot be laid at their doorstep is that they wanted to rewrite the Constitution and weaken the country.

Yes - because if there’s anyone we know has never rewritten the constitution it’s Republicans - especially this strain of Republicans. Just ask Palin what the powers of the VP are.

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October 6, 2008

Cookie Monster On A Diet?

Filed under: Randomness — La Bestia @ 8:42 am
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Yo mama's so dumb she put out the cigarette butt that was heating your house.

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September 25, 2008

News You Can Use

Yo mama's so old she's got Jesus' beeper number.

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Chinese astronauts wave to cameras, remove make-up, drive home.

Chinese publish tales from space, even before take-off - Times Online

With a burst of flame and smoke, a Chinese rocket blasted off into orbit yesterday. But it was the state news agency that moved faster than the speed of light, publishing the transcript of an “in-space” conversation between the astronauts before they had even left Earth.

The Xinhua news agency posted an article on its website breathlessly describing the Shenzhou VII spacecraft in orbit and quoting exchanges between the crew, possibly during the most important part of the mission: China’s first spacewalk. The only problem was that the crew were still on terra firma.

The story had disappeared by the end of the day and its appearance was described as a technical error. The gaffe highlighted China’s readiness to resort to sleight of hand — if not outright fakery — to present a perfect public image, such as the little girl who lip-synched at the Olympics opening ceremony because the child who did the actual singing was not deemed pretty enough.

Back in real time, China yesterday really did launch the riskiest mission so far of its fledgeling space programme, sending three astronauts on a voyage whose highlight will be the space walk.

I guess his forclosure/bankruptcy was worse than we thought

McGangsta: Ed McMahon to rap in viral videos

LOS ANGELES (AP) — Ed McMahon has an unexpected new job title: rapper. The 85-year-old former “Tonight Show” sidekick will star in two viral rap videos for FreeCreditReport.com, a financial Web site owned by credit bureau Experian.

The videos feature McMahon wearing a tracksuit, being chauffeured around Los Angeles in a Cadillac Escalade golf cart and waxing lyrical about his very public financial troubles.

“I knew I could sing the blues, but I didn’t know I could rap,” McMahon said Wednesday.

The videos will appear online in October.

Charles Harris, FreeCreditReport.com’s vice president of strategic marketing, said the company sought out McMahon to star in the humorous spots after seeing him openly discuss his finances on “Larry King Live.” Harris said McMahon represents “a man who is taking charge.”

The only illusion here is that people are still paying this guy. What? ABC couldn’t find anymore “funniest home videos” to fill the timeslot?

The Blaine Game - No dive, no death

Illusionist David Blaine’s upside-down stunt in New York has been labelled a sham by onlookers, while he has admitted it ended in failure.

The crowd gathered in Central Park booed as he was lowered on a rope attached to the metal harness used to suspend him upside down for 60 hours, the Daily Mail reports.

Blaine, 35, was accused of cheating after taking breaks to go to the toilet, drink and receive routine checks by a doctor, but said he had always intended to take the breaks.

“I think the confusion that people had is they didn’t understand: ‘why is he taking breaks’,” Blaine said.

“The truth of the matter is there’s no way to relieve yourself and not put everybody beneath you at risk, basically.”

“I had to keep hydrated since I was fasting - if I was eating then I would need to take real breaks.”

The New York Daily News reports that before being hoisted above the ground, he told reporters he intended to drink through a straw and urinate through a catheter during the stunt.

‘Give us a break’ their headline read, saying there were more boos than cheers.

But Blaine took five-to-ten minute breaks every hour, standing upright on a cherry picker as he drank water and went to the toilet.

“I’m not going to pee all over myself to satisfy those people,” he said.

Blaine also blamed his failed “Dive of Death’ finish on a delay caused by President George Bush’s TV address on the state of the economy.

He said strong winds forced to him to cancel a 44ft plunge to the ground as the dramatic ending.

The Daily Mail reports that he should have been lowered at 9pm on Wednesday night, but had to wait an extra 15 minutes.

Blaine said while waiting for the address to finish the wind picked up and producers of his TV special advised him against the spectacular ending.

He accepted people were left disappointed by the stunt.

“I knew that it didn’t work right when all my friends called me up and said: ‘Wait, what happened, I’m confused’,” he said.

Critics said the ‘Dive of Death’ title was deliberately misleading as ‘there was no dive and thanks to regular breaks when he was allowed to stand upright with little risk of death’, the Daily Mail reports.

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September 18, 2008

SMOKED GUN: Coke Dealer’s Gas Surcharge

Filed under: Randomness — La Bestia @ 8:03 pm
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Yo mama's so fat if she got her shoes shined, she'd have to take his word for it!

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Man, you know the economy is bad when your crack dealer is acting like AT&T!

Cops: Indiana man passed along rising fuel costs to drug customers

SEPTEMBER 18–Spiraling gas prices led an Indiana drug dealer to levy a fuel oil surcharge on customers purchasing cocaine, according to investigators. Anthony Salinas, 18, tacked on the gasoline surcharge when he sold a confidential police source coke on two occasions in June. While arranging one buy, Salinas told the source that a quarter-ounce of cocaine would cost $240–$215 for the drug itself and “$25.00 for gas money to deliver the cocaine,” according to the court affidavit, a copy of which you’ll find below. Salinas, a Hammond resident, was named last week in a two-count felony information charging him with “dealing in cocaine.” (4 pages)

That’s proof positive of inflation.

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September 5, 2008

Snake On A Motherfucking Plane

Filed under: Randomness — La Bestia @ 11:44 pm
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Yo mama's so stupid she studied for blood test & failed.

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That’s right! It happened for real. Again!

NEW DELHI : Crew on an Air India passenger jet discovered a snake coiled up under a seat and were unable to catch it as it slithered around the plane, the airline said on Thursday.

The snake was disturbed during a routine check on the Air India A319 aircraft, which had landed at Delhi airport after a domestic flight from Srinagar.

It evaded capture by slipping into an air vent and could not be found even when staff unscrewed panels inside the fuselage, opened all the doors and fumigated the plane.

“There was commotion which scared the snake and it went further inside,” an airport official quoted.

Reports that the snake was a venomous cobra were denied by an Air India spokesman.

“The aircraft was parked at Delhi airport for maintenance purposes. There was a snake but not a cobra,” he told.

“We have no details of what kind of a snake it was, or where it is now. We have taken up this matter with Delhi airport authorities.”

He denied reports that the snake had caused the plane to be grounded or that its next flight, to Mumbai, had been delayed.

The incident, which occurred on Monday, echoed the plot of 2006 hit film “Snakes on a Plane” starring Samuel L Jackson and Julianna Margulies.

Gotta love those Bollywood productions.

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Bums …

Filed under: Humor, Jokes, Randomness — La Bestia @ 9:13 am
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